A reminder to keep connecting

observational mindfulness

We know that the lockdown has been tough for everyone. But particularly for those people who are struggling with their mental health. So I thought I would talk about some of the positive things that have helped me through it, in the hope it will help others. Staying connected with people, and with the world around us, is very important. I am relatively new to the online world, but I have been able to keep in touch with my friends on Facebook, when we weren't able to meet in person. I have also been able to keep in contact with my sister that way too, as she does practically everything online these days! I have to thank one of my best friends for setting me up on Facebook, as I didn't have a clue how to do it! As well as the things that need doing, like housework, I try to find time every day to do something I enjoy, like reading a book, or playing word games on my laptop, like Scrabble. Since my weekly Dance Fitness class was cancelled back in March, I try to get some exercise each day, like going for a

Gratitude

I have fallen from grace, a fallen woman. Fallen through the cracks, through the net there to save me. I moved across the country to be here, where I knew no one. I fall. “You are away from your abuser. Now carry on with your life”. I fall. I brought up my children, they live their own lives. Independent, a credit to me. I fall. After decades of abuse, I slip through the net. I fall. Alone, exhausted, though not a victim. No, I am a survivor. Yet I fall. “ You don't have young children, we can't help you”. I fall. “ You're not on income support, we can't help you”. I fall. “There are domestic abuse support groups”. They traumatise me more. I fall. I am an older woman, invisible. I fall again, this time I am caught and held. I am listened to and heard. I am held. I open my eyes, I am held. I look around and can see a way forward. I am held. I am unsteady on my feet, I am held. I take steps. I am held. The path is lined with understanding, encouragement, support. I am held. I feel calm, self-reliant, purpose, laughter, confidence. I am held. I am valued. I walk. I am held. I met people who are now friends. I can hold and am held. I was a fallen woman, I fell through the net. Thank you We are Aware, I am held. One woman dies every three days at the hands of their abuser or ex abuser in the UK. It wasn't until 2017 that women aged sixty to seventy four were included in the statistics. Women of every age should be included.

We all have mental health. We all have histories, experiences, lives, responsibilities, fears, pressures, stresses. Some people struggle more than others.

My goodness! What a radical and wonderful idea Now you've put it like that, suddenly it's oh so clear! Eureka! I see clearly now The answer was so simple The stars have suddenly aligned And now begin to twinkle! With no weight upon my shoulders I am floating like a feather Now I've taken your sage advice And pulled myself together....

A girl so sick of being tired of holding it together began to build a fortress to withstand the cruelest weather the plans were drawn, the bricks were laid the mortar set to harden and thorny brambles overtook her once abundant garden Every guest had been rejected and been banished from her door and ships that passed too closely all laid wrecked upon the shore all invitations had been shredded or were stamped "return to sender" and knuckles bruised from knocking on a door marked "do not enter" The fortress stood for many years never to crumble or give in a symbol of protection for the little girl within until the hurt began to fade and clearer was her vision the child inside discovered she had built herself a prison She stepped outside the fortress to wander and explore and found the sunlight hurt her cheeks and her feet a little sore she found the courage to walk on to trust and feel again and find some others walking similar terrain she felt thankful for their company and hopefully concluded that perhaps there was a place for her amongst the walking wounded A place of understanding, where others felt the same a place she saw no judgement when she called her beast by name where she could roar and show her scars and be met with love and care where people give a knowing glance and whisper "we are aware" Some days her cheeks still blister when the sunshine burns too bright and the fortress seems to beckon when the demons come at night yet here she stands amongst the rubble of a fortress built from pride no longer a lost and lonely child for now she's found her tribe

A New Life by BK Edwards The cold seen through the mist. Green shoots begin to sprout, As more of us can get out. We begin to come out of our hibernation. As they start to roll out the vaccination. Flowers bring back colour and cheer. We start to feel that spring is here. Reawakening our souls to life. Breaking through the world of strife. A new season A fresh reason To celebrate, new life. Daffodils growing tall and bright Herald the increasing Light. Hope springs up into Easter. As friends and families bubbles get together. Celebrating new life and a new beginning. As we have the sense of winning. The battle is finished, The war is won In this new season, we can live again. Be revived for hope is alive. As the veil is lifted now torn in two. When we finally get to meet, May we appreciate the people we greet. Learn to be grateful, thankful for what we have. Take care of our minds, make time to relax. May this season bring recovery. As love begins to reach us, and friends come to meet up. As love, kindness and hope come into view. May this be the dawn of living anew. Journey Forward by BK Edwards As we make this journey forward, Many obstacles along the way. We need to learn to listen, And also, to be heard. We have to learn new skills, And ways in which to cope. We will come up against locked doors, But beyond them there is hope. Let's develop strategies, and believe in ourselves. So when we come upon a door, we know how to cope. Gather all that we have learnt, No point leaving it to lay, We need to take it with us, And use it day by day. So now we move together, Empowered and in control. Along the road to recovery, for that's our ultimate goal. Thank you for those that have listened, And those that have understood. And all who'll be there along the way, As we make our journey forward. Be Kind, Be Wise by BK Edwards The average emotion lasts about 90 seconds. Then it gets driven by thoughts and perceptions. We need break the cycle. Use Wise Mind and imagine, A different scenario. A new image in our minds eye. New ways to cope, not just get by. We gain strength from our pain. Change the pathways of our brain. Be positive and make new friends. Find acceptance and new perception. Learn to let go of our problems. Try Mindfulness and meditation. Learn to observe the small things. Like the sun and seasons in nature. Taking the focus away from the future. Visualise a safe place in your mind, and go there. When things lead you to despair. Practice using skills even when you are well. Encourage yourself, use affirmations. Try to coach yourself to say positive things. One day, you might even start to believe them. So be kind to yourself, take one step at a time. Try these new skills they could help change your mind.